Down time

Three hours of unexpected down time all to myself found me lost in the library this afternoon.

You guys? They have books for GROWN-UPS at the library. In Puyallup? An entire floor dedicated to nothing but literature that does not include Dora the Explorer or Curious George.

It had completely escaped me, in all my weekly (and often twice-weekly) wanderings through our gorgeous downtown library that I could also use this building when not in full-mom mode. Like the local Y, the downstairs level of the library is very family-friendly: the kids section is in the back, child-size study tables are located everywhere, and nobody bats an eye if a certain preschooler who shall remain nameless forgets her library voice yet again. And then...there is the upstairs. Also like the Y, this is the floor for grown-ups. Quiet study carrels. Comfy couches and chairs. Cookbooks. Parenting books. Racks and racks and racks of novels. Documentaries.

For me, it felt like walking in to an alternate universe.

Come on, you have to be thinking. It's a section of a library. How awe-inspiring can it possibly be?

At which point I will flare my nostrils in your direction and explain, again, the magnitude that IS my complete lack of free time. Trust me, when I am not working my paying job, I am planning activities and outings that center around things I can do with Zoey. And I swear to you, I adore spending my free time with Zoey. She's great company. Just not second-floor-of-the-library company, you know? I forget sometimes that this whole other adult realm exists in the world, despite my lack of participation in said realm. So yes. Meandering through the second floor of my library was a bit like finding religion on a sunny September afternoon, when I still had two hours left in my free-time bank and all the cookbooks I could ever want right there at my finger tips.

And then? I went to Safeway. By myself. That's right...only responsible for my own seatbelt, and not at the mercy of Turtle, my new nickname for Zoey and her speed (or lack thereof) when getting out of the car. I didn't feel myself age one tiny bit as I zipped through the parking lot.

LIBERATING.

I bought myself a Lean Cuisine pizza (favorite!) and salad fixings for dinner. I went home and ate by myself. I read my magazine at the table. I did not listen to Dora or anything Disneycentric. I listened to Michael Bolton's Greatest Hits.

(Feel free to mock.)

And, at the end of the evening, I was overjoyed to have my daughter back with me. Because wandering the shelves of the library renews my joy of reading. Wandering the aisles of Safeway minus Turtle is refreshing. Eating and reading at the same time? With Michael Bolton playing in the background? Nearly unheard of lately.

But at the end of the day, I am Zoey's mom, and without her, I would be lost.